jackie explains the difference between her christianity and george bush's "christianity." as a robot, religion confounds my logic circuits and makes me want to dip myself in sulfuric acid. but that's just me.

oh my god, did you hear that jackie kashian met her husband online??? no? well watch this clip because she talks about it.

jackie kashian is a nerd, we all know that. but she's got to draw the line somewhere. and that line is drawn at the war reenactment folks.

jackie wonders why you've got to go through airport security hell to see the liberty bell. that rhymes. i'm a poet and i DID know it.

this kashian classic goes out to all the video game aficionados in the viewing audience. may all your quests be fruitful and all your auto thefts be grand.